By: Maham Abid Written: 04/21/2025

Perhaps, it’s finally time to let my guards down.

When you’re hurting alone, it doesn’t matter if you have a crown. 

How can I easily fool myself this well?

I can easily camouflage as “sunshine” to those going through hell.

It’s all a facade, and I know you can see right through.

It’s me who has been unwilling to look at the pain that’s clearly true.

The type of strife that you will get to hear, 

might bring even the “strongest ones” of you to tears. 

Some may think this isn’t an appropriate story to share.

But selfishly, sharing with you all makes me feel a little less scared.

The parts of my story that seem too daunting to bear–

Suddenly don’t appear clouded with fear, all because I dared to share.

Maybe doing it “alone” is not the way to go…

It’s equal parts petrifying to let the real “me” finally show.

Rejection, and judgement are not at all what I need right now.

I need a place to process this grief, to feel, and let it all out.

But, being judged, ostracized, and the things I fear most—

—are ironically the ones I’ve experienced the most up-close.

It’s irrelevant because I already feel unworthy of belonging and love,

but maybe human connection is my “prayer answered” from above.

What if, little by little, I begin to let others in?

Perhaps, I won’t feel like such an unforgivable sin.

So when I begin to ponder about my roller-coaster of a life,

My assuming the role of the “black sheep” doesn’t come as a surprise.

Sure, there are benefits to being “big, bad, and bold..”

Yet, softness can warm up crumpled crevices

that fickle fear won’t ever have the privilege to hold.

Love you all ways, always ❤

IG: @mahamabidtalent